Saturday, May 2, 2015

Never say these things to a single person.

1.  “Well maybe you should work on your relationship with God. How can you have a girlfriend if you’re not fully satisfied in Him?”
--Yeah, because everyone in a relationship has it all completely right and all fully satisfied in God.
And yes, this is a very good time to work on your relationship with God, but there are some things that a spiritual relationship just doesn not provide.
2. "Just keep praying about it"
--More prayer won't bring a woman into my life any sooner, and of course I pray, every day.
3. "Study/read the Bible more"
-Every person needs to hear this, however there comes a point when EVERY activity being done alone, is depressing.  Alone time in the word should always be treasured, in addition to that, reading and praying with someone is something singles miss out on....and yes, I try to read more, but same as above.
4. "It'll happen quick, when it happens"
-This is probably my favorite.  Relationships,  any relationship, takes time.  I know that there are people that have courted and got married in less than a year, but don't remind me of that, it's the LAST thing I want to hear.
5. "Well, when I met my husband/wife..."
-REALLY!?  Your going to use this time to rub it in and, once again, remind me of what I'm missing.
6.  "You must like your alone time"
-Simply put, NO.  Stop reminding me that I have a ton of alone time.
7. 'Why don't you go out and meet people? "
-OK so, are you saying I don't socialize?  There's A LOT more to this than just socializing, and I do.
8. "So and so had to wait until they were this age"
-Are you saying I have to wait until I'm that old?  I realize I might have to, but PLEASE don't remind me of that. 
9. "Your standards are too high"
-So.......there's no woman out there for me? Are you saying lower your standards? I think it's obvious why this one is confusing.
10. "She'll come along when you least expect it."
-First of all, it's hard to be single and to not be aware, to some degree, of every woman that comes into my  life, even just the acquaintances,  (Never knowing how God will work exactly. ...) Secondly,  relationships don't just fall into your lap.  I know they take time, so don't lie and tell me that it'll be unexpected and sudden.
11. "How are you going to meet a lady if you dont to a singles ministry/bible study?"
-So if I meet my future wife outside of bible study, than it's not a legitimate relationship?  I'm just totally confused by this.  Did YOU meet your wife/husband at a bible study?   I'm willing to guess that only about 1% of married Christians met their spouse at a bible study or church.
   
         So what DO you say to a single person?   Ask them about......THEM, not there status or something you know willdon't go depress them, but perhaps what God's been teaching them.  I know a lot of marrieds and couples that complain because this single person doesn't talk to them or seems distant.  It could be that whenever they talk to a married person or couple, they seem to only know how to remind them of their loneliness and single status.   In 1 Corinthians 8, Paul says to take heed lest ye become a stumblingblock.  The reason a single person may not talk to marrieds may be that the marrieds or couples are causing them to stumble into depression.  Of course this isn't the intention of the couple, but it's just the fact of how you could be talking about this in a completely innocent way (and even the single person may seem fine on the outside), but most often, that person is feeling heart wrench all over again. 

         This is a simply a behind-the-scenes glimpse into the thinking of some single people, most likely guys, but women too I'm sure.

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